You can cope – here’s how.
As the due date nears, many women experience a mix of emotions, including excitement and anticipation – but also fear and dread. Thoughts like, “What if I don’t make it to the hospital in time?” or “What if I can’t handle the pain?” are common among first-time moms and even those who’ve already gone through childbirth. And while it’s perfectly normal to have some anxiety about labor and delivery, with all the resources available to us today, it’s just not necessary!
If you’re feeling anxious, it’s important that you know that there are ways to calm your fears. Take a look:
Face your fear
Before you can begin to gain confidence about your upcoming delivery, you need to dig deep and figure out what is really causing you to feel so afraid. Is it just that you have no idea what to expect, or that you’ve heard so many stories about the painful process? No matter what is making you feel anxious, facing it and talking about it with your spouse, a family member, a trusted friend, or your healthcare provider will help alleviate some of those worries, assuming they are calming and supportive.
Get educated
When it comes to dreading labor and delivery, there’s nothing more valuable than educating yourself on the entire process. Childbirth education classes can debunk the myths and give you the facts about what your body goes through, what to expect, and how you can manage your experience. They can also provide you with exercises and breathing and relaxation techniques, as well as position changes that help you get more comfortable during labor. Learning all you can ahead of time will prepare you both emotionally and physically.
Free yourself from expectations
All soon-to-be-moms have an idea of what a “perfect” childbirth experience looks like, but in reality, there’s really no such thing. If you envision a natural childbirth and have set an expectation of yourself to manage the experience without pain medications – putting a time limit on labor and worrying about being judged for giving in to an epidural – you’re only setting yourself up for excess discomfort and stress.
Whether you choose the natural route or need to alter your plan once you’ve gone into labor, it’s best to let go of any idyllic expectations and remember that you are doing the most miraculous thing you’ll ever do – bringing a beautiful new person into the world.
Find a support system
We all need reassurance that everything is going to be alright, and even though you know you will be ok, it helps to have the support of those who can relate to how you’re feeling. Joining a support group like mine (Long Island Pregnancy & Childbirth) can help alleviate some of your fears by offering you the opportunity to connect and bond with others who are going through the same experience.
Know that you can control your experience
Forget what your mother and grandmother went through and realize that today’s moms have much more control. You have the ability to decide where you’ll deliver, whether or not you wish to have medications or an epidural, and the type of experience you want. For examples, you can choose a doula (childbirth coach) or a midwife instead of an OB, or opt to give birth at home or at a birthing center instead of the hospital. Knowing that you have control over your experience will help you feel confident once you go into labor.
If you’re dreading delivery, follow these tips and remember that getting as much information as possible can only serve to alleviate your fears. At Moms On Top, I offer a variety of childbirth education classes, including in-person group or private courses at my Long Island location or through my live, online course. These classes will not only prepare you for labor, delivery, and beyond, but also empower you to manage your childbirth experience the way you envision it.
For more information, send me an email or check the schedule for upcoming classes and register online.
